Stuck in my mind

Here are some of the thought that have been perculating in my mind from the Missio Dei Conference at Denver Seminary with Allen Hirsch and Michael Frost.

Missio Dei- God is the God of Mission
•    Mission is the character of God
•    God sent word to us so that we can live them out
•    Being like Jesus- is being sent

Participatio Christ
•    Set our faces as participants or see where God is already at work
•    Kingdom of God and Kingdom of evil are emerging and intertwined with in each other

Imago Dei
•    Who have you been sent to be- Mercy, Justice, Love
•    Let us be with people no matter who they are.
o    See the “trace” of God in them
•    How do they do it? – Cheer ongoing ministries
o    Support them
o    Volunteer in them
o    Initiate things in your community and globally

•    We have taken the Jesus out of the story and created a religion in the name of Jesus to justify our religiosity
•    “Domesticated Jesus“
•     Christianity – Christ = RELIGION

We need to look at Jesus as the revolutionary that he was.

Follow Jesus into strange places
•    Radical engagements that help
•    Meaningful conversations are happening everywhere with non Christians but not in the church
o    Have time to have spontaneity , frequent open spaces when opportunity arise to have conversations and except invitations from others you rub shoulders with in daily life.

 

The 25 most important questions in the history of Universe:

Or the most random questions people don’t know the answer to.

The 25 most important questions in the history of Universe:

People magazine has its 50 Most Beautiful People … Time has a Person of the Year … And mental_floss magazine – besides having tons of fascinating, cool, and juicy stories, anecdotes, and trivia – now has something that trumps ‘em both: The 25 Most Important Questions in the History of the Universe. Hard questions that matter, like “can a pregnant woman drive in the carpool lane?” or “how can I win at that ultra-important-corporate-decision-making- process, rock-paper-scissor?” and of course, “is turkey a country or a bird first?”. Wait, is it *really* a natural bird? Never mind – don’t answer that. The folks at mental_floss were friendly enough to let us feature their stuff – something that will become a regular feature here at Neatorama (so be kind to them and visit their brand new and very chic blog, ok?). The text is verbatim from the articles, although I did add links, pics, videos and probably a couple of typos. Let’s go to the list, already:

1. What Makes No. 2 Pencils So Darn Special? Little. Yellow. Identical. The No. 2 is definitely No. 1 in the pencil market. It’s a staple in schools and workplaces everywhere, and the required writing utensil for Scantron® tests across the globe. But is it really that great of a pencil? You bet your bippy. No. 2’s use medium weight graphite, which makes them the ideal pencils for general writing. 18th-century French pencil maker Nicolas-Jacques Conté created the number system based on a pencil’s hardness (the higher the number, the harder the graphite), and we’ve been using it ever since. But let’s not forget the other numbers of pencils out there. No. 1’s are made with soft graphite and tend to smudge, and are often used to record bowling scores. No. 3’s and above indicate harder pencils that are most often used for drafting, when you need a sharp, strong point.

2. Who’s That AOL Guy Who Eerily Knows When You’ve Got Mail? Meet Elwood Edwards, the man behind the message. Approximately 63 million times a day, Edwards’ voice greets AOL customers to let them know “you’ve got mail.” Edwards’ career as a disembodied cyber presence stretches back to 1989 when his wife overheard her boss at Quantum Computer Services discussing adding a voice to its online service, Q-Link. At the time, Elwood did voice-overs for radio and television, so his wife suggested him for the company’s new program. Not long after, Quantum changed its name to America Online and premiered AOL 1.0, with Elwood speaking four phrases: “Welcome,” “You’ve got mail,” “File’s done,” and “Goodbye.” Through AOL’s numerous upgrades, one thing has remained the same: Elwood Edwards. Today, his voice is so well known that he’s created a website where fans can order their own custom phrases. The site also includes pictures of Edwards, just in case you’re looking to put a face with that friendly voice you love so much.

3. Where Does Nougat Come From? Like falafel and the number “0,” nougat is a product of Middle Eastern genius. Originally made from a mixture of honey, nuts, and spices, the basic recipe was transplanted to Greece where it lost the spices and gained the name “nugo.” Later cultural exchanges brought the treat to France, where it became “nougat,” and the recipe switched from calling for ground walnuts to ground almonds. In 1650, the French made another change for the better, adding beaten egg whites and creating the fluffier, modern nougat texture. The first commercial nougat factory opened in Montelimar, France, in the late 18th century, and today, the area is renowned for its nougat, with about a dozen manufacturers producing the sugary treat. As for its ugly American cousin – the nougat you’re probably familiar with from candy bars – it’s not “true nougat.” The imitation stuff is chewier, less almond-y, and contains enough artificial preservatives to make a French candy-maker swoon.

4. Is There One Move That’s More Likely to Win a Game of Rock-Paper-Scissors? To answer this question, we turned to the archives of the World Rock-Paper-Scissors Society (seriously!), where we found that RPS players rely on strategy, not probability, to win. From the playground to the annual International World RPS Tournament (really, people, we’re not kidding), outwitting your opponent is job No. 1 for serious competitors. According to the Society, one way to guess what hand someone will throw out is to know how many rounds they’ve won so far. Players who are in the lead will often use scissors, because it’s believed to symbolize aggression, while paper is used for a more subtle attack. Rock is usually a last resort, when players feel their strategies are failing. There are also techniques you can use to mask your move, such as cloaking, in which players will pretend to throw rock and then stick out two fingers at the last second to make scissors. In addition, the true professionals (who do exist) will use sets of three moves, called “gambits,” to help them make their moves out of strategy, not reaction. But that’s not all. The Society also keeps track of how common moves are, particularly as they relate to mentions of RPS in pop culture. For instance, after “The Simpsons” episode where Bart beats Lisa with rock and thinks to himself “Good old rock, nothing beats it,” the Society recorded a .3 percent upswing in the use of rock. But if you’re gonna play, be prepared to pay; RPS can be a dangerous sport. In the late 1980’s, Kenyan Mustafa Nwenge lost a match and the use of a finger when an overzealous opponent “cut his paper” a little too hard and crushed Nwenge’s finger ligaments. See also: Rock Paper Scissors on Steroids

This is a Vargo titanium spork: spoon, fork, can opener, and bottle openers all in one!

5. Which Came First, the Can Opener or the Can? While the mental_floss staff is still working round the clock to figure out that blasted chicken/egg question, this one we can definitely answer. In 1810, a British merchant named Peter Durand patented the tin can, making it possible for sterilized food to be preserved more effectively than was possible with breakable containers. The can were especially useful for long ocean voyages, where glass bottles were prone to breakage, and soon the British Navy was dining on canned veggies and meat. So far, so good. But what Durand (and everybody else for that matter) forgot to invent was a way to open the cans. For almost 50 years, getting into your pork ‘n’ beans required the use of a hammer and a chisel. The first can opener was patented by American inventor Ezra Warner in 1858, but even that wasn’t particularly convenient. These early openers were stationed at the grocery store, and clerks did the honors. It wasn’t until 1870 that the first home can openers made an appearance.

6. How Does a Word Become a Curse Word? Our parents are totally going to ground us for talking about this, but if you must know, a “curse” was originally just a bad type of prayer. Thus, the first curse word was likely “damn,” as in asking God to damn someone to Hell, which was considered taboo because of the religious power it wielded. Condemning people to an eternity of suffering isn’t something to let everyone just go around doing on a daily basis, so the government stepped in, leading to the first censorship laws. Among the first victims was William Shakespeare, whose works were considered quite racy for their time, and not just because he sent his fair share of characters to Hades. The Bard’s plays were littered with sexual innuendo, and eventually, these types of references became swear words as well. Depending on what the sexual mores of the current generation were, formerly innocuous words could suddenly become unfit for polite company. The Victorians, for instance, instituted the practice of referring to the thigh meat on a chicken as “dark meat” because saying the word “leg” or “thigh” at dinner could be enough to give your hostess a case of the vapors. And in the 17th century, the “c-word” that formerly referred to a certain barnyard fowl took on another, er, more inappropriate meaning, leading to the invention of words like “rooster” and “weathervane” to keep the newly dirty word from crossing genteel lips. Sometimes these avoidance tactics went a little too far, though. Case in point: the 1952-53 season of “I Love Lucy,” during which, despite the star’s stomach being about the size of the Superdome, censors prevented the show’s writers from even once mentioning the word “pregnant.” See also: Maledicta Journal, a scholarly journal dedicated to bad, bad words, published by Reinhold Aman [wiki] (a colorful character himself!).

7. Can a Pregnant Woman Drive in the Carpool Lane? Expectant mothers, start your engines! In 1987, a pregnant California woman was ticketed for driving “by herself” in the carpool lane. Sure, the citation was only for $52, but she sued anyway, contending that her 5-month-old fetus constituted a second person. Lo and behold, the jury agreed with her, despite the prosecution’s argument that women could then just stuff pillows up their dresses to drive “carpool” on California’s freeways. But as it turns out, the California Highway Patrol took care of that concern, brushing off the case as a bunch of hooey. Verdict or not, officers said they would continue to ticket solo drivers, even if they claimed to be pregnant. See also: Pregnant mom driving in the carpool lane? Not in Arizona, you won’t | Dummies won’t work, either!

8. Why Do Battery Letters Skip from A to C? Was There Ever a B-Cell Battery? Battery letter designations are based on the size of the battery: for common sizes, A is the smallest, and D is the largest. By the same logic, AA batteries are larger than AAA. Unfortunately for B batteries, it’s not the size that counts. You never see B batteries around because they aren’t very useful. The size never caught on in products made for consumers, so stores didn’t carry them, and the cycle continued. They are sold, but only in Europe, where they’re used primarily to power bicycle lamps.

9. What Does McDonald’s Have in Common with the CIA? “Clowns wanted! We are looking for clowns to fit high profile, permanent positions. Must be wiling to relocate.” If this ad seems a little peculiar, it’s because McDonald’s execs share an intense policy of employee secrecy with their less-delicious counterparts over at the Central Intelligence Agency. Clowns who portray the company mascot, Ronald McDonald, are strictly forbidden from disclosing their identities. It’s also taboo for two (costumed) Ronalds to be in the same place at the same time. In fact, the only time they get together is at the biennial Ronald McDonald Convention, which, as you might imagine, is also very top-secret. All of this helps keep up the image that Ronald, the second most recognizable figure worldwide after Santa, is a single, magical character. There are, of course, many Ronalds – an estimate 250 of the clowns worldwide, in fact. Their average income is about $40,000 a year, but the busiest clowns can bring in as much as $100,000. The Ronald McDonald who appears in the company’s television commercials earns a salary of more than $300,000 and must be booked a year in advance. We could tell you who he is, but then, of course, we’d have to kill you. See also: In Japan, forget Ronald and say hello to McHottie! Ronald McDonald: Chief Happiness Officer [wiki]

10. Why Does Hawaii Have Interstate Highways? While we’d like to believe Hawaii’s Interstate system exists for the sole purpose of annoying George Carlin, the name is actually a misnomer. Not all Interstates physically go from one state to another; the name merely implies that the roads receive federal funding. The three Hawaii Interstates (H1, H2, and H3) became Interstates as part of The Dwight D. Eisenhower System of Interstate and National Defense Highways to protect the U.S. from a Soviet invasion by making it easier to get supplies from one military base to another.

11. Why Do Most Snooze Buttons Only Give You Nine More Minutes of Sleep? By the time the snooze feature was added in the 1950’s, the innards of alarm clocks had long been standardized. This meant that the teeth on the snooze gear had to mesh with the existing gear configuration, leaving engineers with a single choice: They could set the snooze for either a little more than nine minutes, or a little more than 10 minutes. Reports indicated that 10 minutes was too long, since it allowed people to fall back into a “deep” sleep, so clock makers chose the nine-minute gear, believing people would wake up easier and happier after a shorter snooze. We’d tend to disagree with that logic, but, then we must be in the lazy minority. Although today’s digital clocks can be programmed to have a snooze of any length, most stick with nine minutes because that’s what consumers expect. See also: Puzzle Alarm Clock

12. Why Do We Call Them Grandfather Clocks? Grandfather clocks are grandfather clocks for much the same reason M.C. Hammer pants are M.C. Hammer pants: It’s all about the pop music. In 1875, American songwriter Henry Work checked in for a stay at the George Hotel in North Yorkshire, England. In the lobby was a large pendulum clock that had belonged to the inn’s pervious owners, both deceased. The clock was said to have stopped dead – to the minute – on the day the last surviving owner died. Work thought this was a great story and went on to fictionalize it in a song called “My Grandfather’s Clock [wiki].” The lyrics centered around a clock that was “taller by half than the old man himself” and that “stopped short never to go again” when the grandfather died. It was, obviously, a runaway hit. Work sold over a million copies in sheet music, and eventually, the term “grandfather clock” became attached to the style of clock that inspired the song. See also: Eric Harshbarger’s Lego Grandfather Clock

13. Was Turkey a Bird or a Country First? And the award goes to: Turkey-the-country! Turns out, turkey-the-bird is native to North America and acquired its name when the Spanish brought it from Mexico to Europe. When the bird made its debut in England, it was mistaken for a Guinea Hen, a common fowl regularly imported from Africa by Turks. Then the English, demonstrating that they are the real turkeys in this story, named the bird after its supposed importers.

Turkey Target found at Airhog

14. How Much Wood Would a Woodchuck Chuck if a Woodchuck Could Chuck Wood? Probably none. Woodchucks aren’t particularly tree-oriented, and while they can climb to find food, they prefer being on the ground. In fact, they got the name “woodchuck” from British trappers who couldn’t quite wrap their tongues around the Cree Indian name “wuchak.” More commonly (and accurately) known as groundhogs, these animals are closely related to squirrels, marmots, and prairie dogs, with which they share an affinity for burrowing. And actually, a burrowing woodchuck can chuck dirt, in the form of tunnels that can reach five feet deep and as much as 35 feet in length. So, based on that number, New York State wildlife expert Richard Thomas calculated that if a woodchuck could chuck wood, he could chuck as much as 700 pounds of the stuff.

15. We Know Nothing Better Has Come Along Since then, But Who Invented Sliced Bread Anyway? It may get a lot of credit now, but at the time of its debut in 1928, sliced bread received less-than-rave reviews. Baker and inventor Otto Frederick Rohwedder had spent 15 years perfecting his bread slicer (finally settling on one that wrapped the sliced bread to hold it together as opposed to the hat pins he’d tried earlier), but consumers weren’t quick to convert. People found the sliced bread strange and senseless. It wasn’t until the advent of Wonder Bread, and the collective realization that sliced bread worked better in the toaster, that Rohwedder’s invention really took off. By World War II, the military was using sliced bread to serve peanut butter & jelly sandwiches as part of soldiers’ rations. Previously uncommon, the PB&J gained a loyal following among servicemen, who kept making the sandwich, sliced bread and all, after they came back to the home front. Neatorama note: Sliced Bread photoshop job by Nana, at the always amusing Worth1000 (Mucho Macho 2)

16. Why Is It Called “Blackmail?” The first blackmailers were Scottish landlords who exploited farmers by making them pay rent in livestock or services if they couldn’t pay in cash. The goods they had to hand over were usually worth more than the rent owned, and the landlords didn’t make change. Around the same time, local chieftains started going after the same farmers with the kind of scheme the mafia usually refers to as “selling insurance.” They made an offer the farmers couldn’t refuse: pay a fee for protection. If the farmers didn’t pay, then the chieftains would unfortunately be unable to prevent ruffians from destroying crops and sacking property. The Scottish farmers called both nefarious deals “black” because they associated that color with evil, and because both payments were made in goods rather than silver coins (called “white money”). As for the “mail” part, it doesn’t refer to the postal system. That “mail” comes from the German word for “pouch.” The “mail” in blackmail is related to the Old Norse word for “payment” or “agreement.” Neatorama’s note: The photo above is of Monty Python’s skit Blackmail [wiki], where “Michael Palin plays a smarmy television game show host who extorts money from his viewers by threatening to reveal embarrassing or illegal facts about them. One game is “Stop the film,” where a scandalous film is played until a phone call is received, and the amount of money needed increases the longer the subject waits.”

17. Is It Possible to Own Property on the Moon? That depends on what your definition of is, is. According to the 1967 Outer Space Treaty, countries can’t own lunar real state. However, the Treaty doesn’t say anything about the rights of individuals to claim land. Enter Dennis Hope, a California entrepreneur / ventriloquist who’d exploited the loophole to its fullest. In 1980, Hope announced his ownership to the moon (and, incidentally, the rest of the solar system) and promptly started selling off plots through his company, Lunar Embassy. Space-faring nations vehemently denied the legality of Hope’s business, pointing to the 1979 Moon Treaty, which forbids individual interstellar land investment. Finding yet another loophole, Hope countered by nothing that none of the space nations ever actually signed that treaty after the U.S. and Russia both refused. But Moon Treaty or not, an individual can still only own land through the jurisdiction of his or her home country, and if nations can’t own it, then people can’t own land through them. Tenuous as his argument is, Hope has still managed to inspire some serious investors. To date, the Lunar Embassy has made more than $1.6 million. If you’re interested, plots go for as little as $30, but don’t spend all your money on moon land: mental_floss has some contacts with beautiful oceanfront lots in Arizona and we’d love to get you in on the ground floor. See also: Space Article | Google Moon

18. Why Can’t You Tickle yourself? Much to the dismay of wacky masochist everywhere, the human brain is wired against self-tickling. Because the brain controls movement, it knows what your hand is going to do before you do it. Thus it anticipates the exact force, location, and speed of the tickle and uses that information to desensitize you to your own roving hands. So why do we have a tickle response anyway? Turns out, it’s a defense reaction meant to alert our cave-dwelling ancestors to creepy crawlies that didn’t know their place, and the uncontrollable laughing fit that goes along with it is actually a panic response. Even if you know someone else is about to go for your rib cage, it’s hard to turn the response off because a) your brain can’t anticipate exactly how and where they’ll tickle you and b) knowing someone is about to tickle you is usually enough to keep those panic receptors open and ready to go. See also: Tickle Salon and Tickle Robot | Andre Stubbe and Markus Lerner’s ticklish robot | for something completely different: trout tickling [wiki], and who can forget: Tickle Me Elmo [wiki]

19. Human Meat Isn’t Appetizing, But is It Healthy? You are what you eat. So it stands to reason that if you’re a cannibal, and you eat a diseased, dead guy, you’re going to become a diseased, dead guy. But the cannibalistic Fore people of New Guinea found that out the hard way. For most of the 20th century, the Fore were plagued with a disease called Kuru [wiki], also known as the laughing death. Kuru, a relative of mad cow disease, paralyzes its victims and cause dementia by turning the brain into something resembling Swiss cheese – literally creating holes in the brain. Fascinated by what he though was a genetic disorder, scientist Daniel Carleton Gajdusek [wiki] traveled to New Guinea in 1957 to study the Fore. While there, he discovered that women made up the vast majority of Kuru victims. He also noticed that women and children were the ones ceremonially eating the brains and intestines of dead relatives. Putting two and two together, Gajdusek deduced that the Fore were ingesting the prions, or misshapen proteins, that caused the disease. Gajdusek received a Nobel Prize for his work, and today, cannibalism and Kuru are all but wiped out in New Guinea. See also: University of Utah’s Prions:On the Trail of Killer Proteins

20. Can You Actually Sense Weather with an Injured body Part? There was a time when scientists would walk barefoot, through the snow, uphill both ways, just to ridicule you for believing that sensing weather with the body was anything but an old wives’ tale. Today, many will still scoff at the idea, but maybe just in an email. In 1961, researchers at the University of Pennsylvania Medical School conducted a series of tests that proved changes in climate could affect your health, especially if you suffered from arthritis. It works like this: When a storm is approaching, the barometric pressure of the air falls, which can cause an inflammation around a bone injury to swell and stretch, irritating the nerves around the joint and causing a lot of pain. The Pennsylvania scientists tested their theory on 12 volunteers in a climate-controlled chamber, and found that those who had arthritis experienced more pain when the air pressure was lower, thus suggesting that they could sense an approaching storm.

21. Why Won’t Pineapple and Jell-O® Be Friends? If Jell-O® ads and 1950’s cookbooks are to be believed, you can mix almost anything with gelatin and have it come out tasty. Ham? Absolutely. Carrots? Sure thing. Tomato soup? M’m, m’m, good. The only ingredient that seems to be taboo is one that actually sounds delicious: fresh pineapple. Unfortunately, the tropical treat works like kryptonite on Jell-O® because it contains an enzyme called bromelain, which prevents gelatin from forming into a solid. But fret not, fruit salad mold fans: canned pineapple doesn’t contain bromelain. The canning process heats the pineapple to a temperature sufficient to break the enzyme down, making it oh-so Jell-O® friendly. See also: Elizabeth Hickok’s San Francisco in Jell-O.

22. What are Sea-Monkeys®, Anyway? Ah, Sea-Monkeys®. You know ‘em; you love ‘em; you’re totally confused by them. Well, consider he monkey mystery solved. Turns out, they’re Artemia salinas, or brine shrimp. In the 1960’s, inventor Harold von Braunhut [wiki] discovered that the eggs of these shrimp lie dormant in salt flats waiting for the right conditions before they spring to life, so he started experimenting with them for his toy product, Instant-Life. But later, he changed the name (and struck pop culture gold) after a colleague heard him call the creatures his “cute little sea monkeys.” The shrimp became popular because of their ability to “come back to life” after being stored dry on a shelf, but hey weren’t so popular after children discovered that the shrimp only had a life span of about a month. Over the years, however, Von Braunhut has managed to breed better Sea-Monkeys®. Today’s comic book ads now promise that they will live up to two years. Von Braunhut, who passed away in 2003, was also the man responsible for X-Ray Specs, and the late 1980s’ hermit crab craze.

23. How Many Pounds of Chimpanzee are Needed to Defeat the Average Human? In 1924, the Bronx Zoo tested the relative strength of a 165-pound man against a 165-pound chimpanzee. Using a dynamometer, which measures strength by the force of a pull on a spring, the man was able to pull 210 pounds. The chimp pulled almost 900. The lesson: Don’t mess with the apes. Pound for pound, chimpanzees are about five times stronger than humans. In fact, a human is no match for a chimpanzee, regardless of its age or sex. In the same Bronx experiment, a 135-pound female chimp pulled a whopping 1,260 pounds. Scientists also estimate that, at the tender age of five, young chimpanzees are already stronger than adult humans. See also: Karate Chimp | Smoking Chimp | Chimp Playing Ms. Pac-Man | Chimp vs. Navy Seal Obstacle Race [video]

24. Why are Grape-Nuts® Neither Grapes Nor Nuts? Post Company founder Charles W. Post might have been good at creating popular cereals, but he wasn’t the best at naming them. One of his first breakfast treats, Post Toasties, was originally known by the more, er, zealous name, Elijah’s Manna. And then there’s the misleading Grape-Nuts®, which Charles named after a key ingredient in the cereal called maltose, which tasted like nuts and, at the time, was known as “grape sugar.” Hence, Grape-Nuts. It may sound like false advertising, but it’s not. Post would likely be protected from such allegations by that precious little hyphen. The Federal Trade Commission might consider a cereal called Grape Nuts “deceitful,” but that hyphen makes the name “fanciful,” which excludes it from prosecution according to the 1906 Pure Food and Drug Act.

25. How Many Licks Does It Take to Get to the Center of a Tootsie Pop? No thanks to that animated owl and his woeful lack of willpower, this question has plagued the American public ever since the commercial first aired in 1970. Fortunately, there have been plenty of noble efforts to get to the bottom (or center, as the case may be) of it all. But the answer depends on who you ask. A group of students at Swarthmore Junior High conducted an extensive study on the subject and concluded that getting to the center of a Tootsie Pop took a statistical average of 144 licks. However, the more ambitious and distrusting engineering students at Purdue University chose instead to rely on a “licking machine” modeled after the human tongue for their results, and found that it took an average of 364 licks. Other studies have been done, and all results vary, so only one thing is certain: The world may never know. See also: link for video above [YouTube]

Big thanks to mental_floss for this awesome list! Don’t forget to check out their new blog – one of my favorite stopping places on the Net:

 

Loss & Life

 

I read this in the Lansing State Journal and decided it was worth reading for others. Take some time and read this it was a great perspective on loss and life. It meant a lot to me and I hope it means something to you also.

Published August 19, 2007
[ From Lansing State Journal ]

Schneider: 5 years later, my loss – its lessons – stay with me every day

John
Schneider

Five years ago in the immediate aftermath of my daughter’s drowning, when my loss was a throbbing gash, a man who had suffered a similar blow offered me this prognosis:

The bleeding would stop. The wound would heal over. The raw pain would subside. But the loss would stay with me forever, like an irretrievable piece of shrapnel or an inoperable, nonfatal heart murmur.

The injury wouldn’t necessarily restrict my mobility nor would it preclude my capacity for comfort and joy. And allowed to cure under the right conditions- given adequate space and time – the loss would age and mellow into something sweet and dignified. Something endured.

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The hole would fill in enough to reveal a new perspective. It would add a dimension to my humanity. It would help me see the bigger picture.

Somebody else – another man well-traveled on the trail of tears – told me I would be able one day to put my loss upon the top shelf of my closet, where it would remain inconspicuous but always present, like a hat I was attached to but seldom wore.

A better fit

Occasionally, I would stumble upon it while looking for something else. Maybe I would take it off the shelf and examine it. Eventually, I would try it on and I would begin to notice, as the years went by, the fit had become increasingly comfortable.

Eventually – and this was the unbelievable thing about what the man told me- I might purposely seek it out from time to time and find some measure of peace in its weight upon my head.

In any case, it would be mine forever. I would never be able to donate it to the Salvation Army, nor, in the end, would I wish to.

More than one person who had been to the brink of despair and back predicted I would soon discover that the common idiom of grief was largely inadequate and, in some cases, entirely irrelevant.

Wrong vocabulary

Only the uninitiated speak of “getting over it,” or “through it.” Only the blissfully ignorant believe it’s possible – or desirable – to put a thing like this “behind us,” as though it were a foolish investment or a bad meal.

The fact is, it’s just not possible to outrun it, even if we wanted to. Our best hope is to come to terms with it, to make it part of who we are and how we get from one day to the next.

There are no definitive answers to the question “Why?” – only theories. There is no “period of mourning” – only the rest of our lives.

And so, five years down the road, it has come to pass. The bleeding has stopped.

The heart murmur, though incurable, does not keep me down. My loss rests upon its shelf, but gathers no dust. I bring it down frequently, but not obsessively. I look it over regularly, and it still has lessons to teach me.

I am more conscious than ever of life’s fragility and uncertainty. I appreciate, more than I did five years ago, the importance of being grateful for the things we have, for as long as we have them.

I understand, in a way that I never did before, that life is shorter than we think. And that’s a good thing to know.

“Why?” is no longer the pressing question that it once was. It now seems beside the point.

My loss is not behind me. It is not a thing of the past. It is not something I’ll ever get through if I live to be 100.

It is right here with me, every hour of every day. That’s exactly where it belongs.

 

A shared project

Here are some pictures of the project at Shared pregnancy resource. If you have any pictures to add to the mix let me know. Thanks for all your hard work!

 

Watching others with Love

I begin thinking about how people do or do not look at blogs and if it was a kind of intrusive behavior to observe someones thoughts without them knowing. This idea of watching or observing has been peculating through my life of late. I know I have made this public and so I allow people a window in which to look at the unusual things that run through my head. (at least filtered most of the time) One of the ways this subject has been coming to me is in music. I think media, thoughts and experiences in my life have a way of sensing the pulse on my soul. The song is ” People Watching” by Jack Johnson the lyrics go this way:

“People Watching”

Well I’m just people watching
The other people watching me
And we’re all people watching
The other people watching we
We’re as lonely as we wanted to be
We’re all as lonely as we wanted to be
Just as lonely as we wanted to be
I’m just you, you’re just me
But it’s only true if we believe
Well there really ain’t no use in stopping
What nobody never told me not to do
So I’ll keep people watching, watching me now
Finding my way back to you……

I will admit I do like to sit and watch people also so how is that different then what I explained above? Is that bad? I have also been intrigued by the study of Sociology which is the study of human behavior in many different ways. I used to think I was not comfortable with this peaking into people lives but realize that it is vital and important. It is the sharing of one selves that others begin to see what and who you really are. It also allows for others to understand the experiences you have had in the past in which have made you become who you are and why you are the way you are. In doing this it also allows other to keep accountability for you through out your life. I think this is a lost art because of its destructive reputation and the way it has been used in the past. The very idea of having accountability with a group of people helping you discern your life and situations can be a very healthy thing in a community of Love. The Quakers have a great way of doing this with groups called “discernment groups”. [For over 350 years of Quakerism, the Friends have placed a high value on decision-making in community. They have redefined their process into what Chuck Orwiler calls “the art of voluntary attention practiced within a culture of listening,”3 or more simply, corporate discernment. Friends have been intentional about corporate discernment, and whether they like it or not, they have valuable lessons to share lessons which can foster the most creative, most unified, and most dynamic]…. groups.

I started to rethink this idea after I read the liner notes of a Johnny Cash album written for children. (getting into Johnny Cash and thought this would be a interesting insight into his work) Here are the liner notes on fatherhood written by Johnny Cash’s son about his father:

Johnny Cash: Father, Friend, and Fisherman

My father loved children.

I remember, when I was young, my father taking me to the skating rink. He would load up a bunch of my cousins, friends and myself, and off we would go for a big Friday night in downtown Hendersonville. Anyone, who ever saw my dad skate, could never forget. On the rink, he was dangerous, and had little control. this did not stop him from going at it with all he had. By the end of the night he was usually as sore and bruised up as me, if not more so.

Sometimes, we would just get in his long black Fleetwood Cadillac and drive, looking for a place to fish. We would find some creek or stream somewhere and get out our poles. We would sit for hours, just he and I. Nothing else in the world mattered during those quiet times together except the bobber, the bait and the fish. We caught thousands.

He loved the movies. In the 1970s, when Christopher Reeve’s “Superman” was released, he rented out an entire theater for an afternoon showing, and loaded up the whole second and third grade classes from my school in buses and took us all to the movies, some one hundred eighty-plus kids. Dad became forever endeared to my schoolmates’ hearts for this.

My father loved children.

This was the father I knew, a fun loving, easy going, laughing man who was, in scores of ways, as big a kid as I have ever been. I think that is the biggest reason Dad loved children so much: He was a kid himself. For a large part of my life my father was free in his heart, the most important thing in the world to him, just to have fun.

I see the dark, foreboding figure of Johnny Cash far too much these days. The dark side of John R. Cash is real and significant, but there is another that is just as true, and for us, those who love the man, even more important to remember:

The big kid.

He always would have rather laughed than cried.

John Carter Cash 3/1/06

This insight into Johnny’s Cash life gave us a great deal of information into his relationship with this father and how he looks at fatherhood. “Walk the line” showed this tension in their relationship yet I think living in community means reflecting on the world around us and others holding you accountable for your actions. People appropriately and lovingly participation in asking you to live a life with Christ. Even if it seems intrusive. We should remember our finer moments and our moments that are not so great. Here’s to people watching in loving accountable communities that make us better people. Let our lives messyness show who we really are. Eric

 

Things unsaid and things said

Several months ago, I had the opportunity to go to a conference called “thinspace, the kingdom of God is near” in Cincinnati, Ohio. I was looking forward to going to this since it has been a long time since I have gone to any type of conference. I was particularly excited because this was the first conference in which I was going to that really pertained to my real life of missional living. Yes I have been to other conferences related to other ministry situations but this I truly felt comfortable with. I had a great opportunity to go with my loving wife (Very good looking if you ask me) and several of my fellow friends (non of them introverted or unintelligent) and spiritual journey partners. It took about 5 hours to go down there and with all the potential distractions (Ipods, radio,etc.) we did not use them one time. It was a stream of conversation, questions, comments, discernment for one another that seemed so natural. Yes the stream had times of rushing water where your head could barely stay above water and their were times when their were there were very little words spoken. Though out this time it was the things unsaid that were the most important. It was the simple gestures and also the larger things. It was the willingness to encourage you as you processed the things you learned. The simple hug and looks that made you laugh or question the things being said by others. It was the things like putting my wife up for three nights in friends small house (with one bath) when our accommodation’s didn’t work out as planned. Never less it was the things said and unsaid that made this experience so wonderful. I hope that you can reflect and experience these things in your journey.

PS. If you would like to listen to some of the speakers/ presenters that were at the conference follow the link above. Sorry not all my conversations were recorded, thank God!

 

Participation, Connection, Kingdom Living

 I will admit part of my life is very connected to the tastes of a two 1/2 years old appetite. I am a proud parent of two wonderful boys who are 2 1/2 and 8 months old. My world as a stay at home Dad, Jesus follower in a simple church often collide in many different ways. I often find the prophetic word of God can come from the lips of my sons mouth as he discovers his world around him. Belive me there are times when the opposite is true also. The other day I was cleaning up (a endless task in my house) while Braden was watching a PBS show called “Its a big, big world”. 

In this show their is a sloth which sings a song in the end of the show.  Part of the songs goes like this :

“I’m a big old sloth
I may be slow
But see my friends
Swing high and low

Come to the big world
It’s a big, big world
Come to the big world
Such a big, big world
It’s a big world

It’s a big, big world”

At the end of the song the sloth puts his hand on the screen and then waves good bye. My son no matter where he is or how busy he is he runs over to the screen.  He loves to participate by reaching his hand up to the screen placing his hand on the sloths hand and then waves good bye.

This reminds me that God has invited and invites us continully into full participation, and connection with him in his kingdom. Just like the Sloth he reaches out his hand as a invitation to join God in the here and now. He does not just send us out all alone he offers his hand to us and empowers us to be part of the work in the kingdom today. Do we run in enthusiasm to actively participate, connect with the living God in the Kingdom or community we live in our daily lives? Lets all run and reach out to the hand of God to shape and mold us to live in this big big world. 

                    

 

Matthew 5:43-48 (The Message)

43-47″You’re familiar with the old written law, ‘Love your friend,’ and its unwritten companion, ‘Hate your enemy.’ I’m challenging that. I’m telling you to love your enemies. Let them bring out the best in you, not the worst. When someone gives you a hard time, respond with the energies of prayer, for then you are working out of your true selves, your God-created selves. This is what God does. He gives his best—the sun to warm and the rain to nourish—to everyone, regardless: the good and bad, the nice and nasty. If all you do is love the lovable, do you expect a bonus? Anybody can do that. If you simply say hello to those who greet you, do you expect a medal? Any run-of-the-mill sinner does that.

48″In a word, what I’m saying is, Grow up. You’re kingdom subjects. Now live like it. Live out your God-created identity. Live generously and graciously toward others, the way God lives toward you.”

 

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